Do you ever feel like you are walking around in a fog? Like you just can’t concentrate, and you have no idea why?
It is called “Fibro Fog,” and it is quite common for people with Fibromyalgia to have. As with all parts of this condition, no one really knows why it happens.
This week, I had a lot of it, and I find that I become the most unproductive person when it happens. I can’t seem to finish any one thing because I can’t stay focused on any one thing. My brain just jumps around, and then I get really frustrated because I want to finish things and I just can’t.
By Friday, my frustrations were high and then I had moved into full-blown “fibro flare,” which just means that my body caught up with my brain and now everything hurt and all I wanted to do was go back to bed.
I used to call in sick on days like Friday, especially if I was having a difficult week. But when sick days are valuable because you don’t get too many of them, you don’t call in sick anymore. You try to plaster on a smile, and you go to work. I hate that I have to do that. But I do. Because I want to use my time off for fun things, not a sickness that won’t go away. Ever.
I don’t want this to sound like complaining. I just want to help people understand that there are invisible illnesses out there that you may not know someone is even fighting. Even I have to remind myself every day of that fact, and I am one of those people.
But here’s the thing, I am grateful that I don’t have a severe case of Fibro. I am grateful that I can still work and be out in the world doing things.
I got a big reminder to be grateful this week. I sat in a hospital waiting room for a number of hours on Tuesday. And you overhear conversations there, whether you like it or not. There were some people who were there for minor things, but some were there for big things. Their loved ones were really sick, maybe on the verge of dying, and I deeply felt the heartbreak in their worlds. I could do nothing for them, except offer prayers.
The universe keeps offering me these reminders that life is short and I need to take advantage of it. Tuesday’s events were a huge reminder. I need to seize the opportunities that I have and remember that I am fortunate just to be here, alive and happy.
So, I rested yesterday. Cleared the fog. Today, I will do the things that I love. I might even do something that makes me uncomfortable. And I will make sure that I am living my one, precious life despite the barriers that might get thrown in my way.
What about you? Are living your life the way you want to?